Isobel

Words & Music: Jake Thackray

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Nobody else is loved so well by Isobel, by Isobel,
Oh, nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
She's my rose, my asphodel, my demoiselle, my Jezebel,
But nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.

I admire those men who know about mathematics,
Who calculate and cipher and compute.
I used to think that logarithms were things that scuttled about in attics
And surds were little flowers with square roots.
What boots it?

Nobody else is loved so well by Isobel, by Isobel,
Oh, nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
At geometry I don't excel: my triangles go parallel.
But nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.

I marvel at musicians: maestros, virtuosos;
They're sensitive and deft beyond belief.
The only tune that I know well is Ring-a-Rosoes
And I can only whistle it through me teeth.
But good grief!

Nobody else is loved so well by Isobel, by Isobel,
Oh, nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
I couldn't produce a tuneful decibel, not even if I strained like hell.
But nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.

Some can swim for miles and dive from dizzy heights,
From deep and stormy seas they never shrink.
I am not amphibious or watertight,
My function in the water is to sink.
But just think!

Nobody else is loved so well by Isobel, by Isobel,
Oh, nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
Upon the sea the slightest swell makes me expel one hell of a yell.
But nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.

Some men are sophisticated, gay and hearty;
Polite and poised and witty, they're such fun.
I am never welcome to a cocktail party:
I drink too much or leave my flies undone.
But thumbs up!

Nobody else is loved so well by Isobel, by Isobel,
Oh, nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
I can't hold my whisky well and I've not got many jokes to tell.
But nobody else is loved so well by ever-loving Isobel,
My one and only Isobel, my little Iso-Isobel -
All other women I repel
'Cause I can't spell and I smell as well,
But nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.


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